Nicole Scherzinger: What’s in a Name?

By Kabeer Sharma · Nov 2013 · 6 min read

Read FHM India in the digital libraryEvery issue, every shoot, on TCG Media.Read now

Her fame is as big as her name – Nicole Prescovia Elikolani Valiente Scherzinger. Who was that rascal who said, “What’s in a name?”

Two weeks ago, she instagrammed a picture of a box of sausage rolls. Not her eating them, just a mountain of vertically arranged sausage rolls in a brown cardboard box. 20,000 people hearted it. So can you imagine the sort of online apocalypse-inducing hectic activity that must have gone on when she was back home in Hawaii paddle-boating and posting twerking pictures in a striped bikini last month?

Read FHM India in the digital libraryEvery issue, every shoot, on TCG Media.

Even though she might be universally worshipped for her sex goddess status, but there is some debate over which video was Miss Scherzinger’s hottest video yet. Her single Whatever You Like, which features her in the sauciest escape attempt in human history has generated 37 million YouTube hits, while Right There featuring Miss Scherzinger gyrating near an abandoned train track has netted 91 million views. Not too shabby. Clearly, if you are Nicole Scherzy, have 4.3 million people hanging on to your every tweet and 500,000 people falling over themselves to heart your selfies, you don’t need to bother with trifle things like storylines in videos. But she does bother about them anyway. She’s a good soul like that.

And a hot one as well. One minute she’s getting out of the ocean in a printed bikini for X-Factor (a show she is a judge for), the next she is tweeting support to her team in the show and then sending off good vibes to Miley after her VMA twerking. “She’s at that age when you’re just transferring into your career and like to do more controversial things and I remember the energy you feel when all this chaos goes on. She’s on fire, a ball full of energy. I love Miley,” she tells FHM.

Every once in a while, when things get boring, she makes an off-cuff remark about having ‘Had all the X-Factor boys’ and steps out dressed out in a black leather bustier and a skirt looking like well, at least a couple of million bucks. Plus, she’s finally managed to put her on-again off again romance with a little known bloke called Lewis Hamilton behind her. Which means for the first time in a really, really long time, Miss Scherzinger is a 100 percent certifiably single, which is why it’s the

best time in the world for her to be on an FHM cover. “Yes I’m single,” she confirms. True she went through an ordering ginormous pizzas and binge eating phase, but she’s done with that now.

“I’m probably in one of the best places in my life. Earlier I wasn’t able to enjoy things because I was working too hard,” she confesses. And X-Factor has helped with that, though of course emerging from the water in slow mo in a bikini was just an added bonus.

So men of the world, if ever there was an opportunity, it’s now. Just walk up to her and say hello, there will be no going toe-to-toe with 10 Mossad-trained body guards before getting to her because she’s just that kind of a girl everyone can come say hello to.”

“Ultimately, you want to be with someone you can be yourself around. My grandmother taught me that the person you are going to be around isn’t going to be your Prince Charming – it’s the person you are going to be able to work on a relationship with. It’s always a work in progress,” Nicole explains.

Like all hot women she too has some entry-level requirements though and being happy on a beach is just one of them. The fact that you’d have her on the beach by your side should convert even the most seasoned hill faithful’s. “I’m Hawaiian, I love the water and the beach.”

Growing up, she was “always in a bikini and surf shorts, reading surf magazines.” A love her Instagram pictures will more than testify to. But we aren’t Insta-stalking her, we promise.

Yet between all that, the pictures of the beaver-printed underwear she shares as her “favourite new undies” and the pouting selfies in dresses fitted by some naughty god, all she really wants is to sit back at home and do nothing. Plus, she likes men who can cook. “My perfect night would be a home cooked meal with my boyfriend,” she smiles. But you needn’t worry, because she cooks too. Nothing fancy, just some cakes, pies and other bakes… “Down home simple Southern cooking.” And when she says Southern, don’t imagine her trying to make a Dosa. That’s not the kind of Southern she is talking about.

“I really want to come down to India to do a concert or perform in a music show,” she confesses. She was here performing at a wedding last December, but the seed of wanting to do a show in India was planted much earlier. She’s wanted to do that ever since the Pussycat Dolls (the defunct band she was the hottest member of, which you might remember from such hot videos as Button) recorded Jai Ho from Slumdog Millionaire. And Nicole and India clearly work – the song went on to become #1 in 30 countries and Nicole and the rest of the Pussycat’s showed up on the red carpet wearing black saris and hotter than hell décolletage brandishing blouses. Fun times those. “10, of course” she says when we broach the subject of the sari’s sex appeal.

Speaking about another sexpot in a sari who is her friend and is now also a pop-singer in her own right – Priyanka Chopra, she exclaims, “I love her”. “She is so talented and beautiful. I loved her album.” Her own new album should be out in early 2014 and unlike Taylor Swift, don’t expect her to bitch about her breakup with the aforementioned ‘little known’ gent. She’s just not that sort of a woman. “I’m a perfectionist. Right now, I’m busy with X-factor, so will start work on the album after that.” She’s a “perfectionist” so it might take a while. Till then you can count on her flashing her washboard abs and sculpted pins as a part of her life goal to turn men’s knees into jello. It doesn’t take too much of an effort for her though – she can do that with equal ease in a figure smooching D&G dress, as she can in a long skirt or sweats when she is having a “down day” about her body. Somehow the conversation drifts to movies. We’re asking her why we haven’t seen her since her Lily Poison role in MIB 3 where she arrived in a tight leather skirt and hooker boots with a cake for Boris the Animal and was promptly projected into outer space. “I’d definitely like to do another film, it’s just a matter of finding time.”

Compared to the other ladies in her, let’s just say profession, and even the Indian Finance Ministry for that matter, she has a definite plan. “In five years, I’d like to have done a world tour and started a family. Hopefully, I’d be married and have a film and a couple of big albums under my belt.” She’s said other things too, but we’ve stopped listening – and you should too.

NICOLE SCHERZINGER IS SINGLE, SHE IS LOOKING TO START A FAMILY and you’re still trying to burn a hole in the pages with your eyes. Sigh.