The big question: have I got friends with benefits all wrong?
Is there such a thing as no-strings sex with a mate? Three girls tell us how friends with benefits really works.
It doesn’t take the bonce of Professor Brian Cox to work out why, according to a recent government-funded poll, a whopping one third of all under-forties enjoy casual sex with a friend.
Experimental, exciting and damn good naked fumbles with a girl you like, without the ‘in a relationship’ spats about leaving your damp towel on the bed again? It sounds like the stuff dreams are made of. Sexy, sexy dreams.
But before you run headfirst into your phonebook and dial up your hottest girl mate for a touch of the good stuff, know this–there’s a whole load of unwritten laws you must abide by to make it work, all of which are there to stop the both of you ending up loved-up emotional wrecks. We’ll let three of FHM ’s beautiful friends explain…
What does ‘friends with benefits’ mean to you?
Jo: It’s a good friend that you have sex with, no strings attached.
Layla: I see it as a friend who you can practise your moves on. The key is not getting attached. Don’t have sex every day: use it like a spicy treat.
Lana: Honesty makes it work, then you know where you both stand. “I’ve had a really shit day, do you want to fuck?” or “I’ve just been sat over the wheel of the bus and need to get jiggy.” What? Nobody else had that?
What’s your experience of friends with benefits?
Layla: It worked too well, if you know what I mean. We had sex too much, and it became official. We grew fond of each other. It easily happens.
Any tips on making sure you don’t get attached?
Lana: I said, “Thanks for the sex” once. Oh, and it sounds stupid, but a high five is a really good way to keep it light-hearted. Trust me.
What sort of person makes a good FWB?
Jo: Not the sort of person you daydream about, but someone you could have a great night out with.
Lana: If you think about them when you’re horny, that’s a good sign.
How should a guy ask a girl if she’ll be his FWB?
Layla: Again, just be honest!
Lana: Be blunt and just come out with it. Don’t send a dick pic, though.
Can you have more than one friend with benefits?
Jo: One is healthy. Any more just gets too difficult.
Layla: But what if you find another person you want to hook up with?
Lana: You drop one. There are no strings. It should be emotionless.
Layla: It’s not that easy, though. You’ve probably had amazing sex, so giving it up is actually very tough!
Jo: Just make it a threesome.
Is there anything FWBs can do that loved-up couples can’t?
Jo: They definitely can’t say ‘I love you’. Hugging after sex is a huge no.
Lana: But you can be much more experimental with positions, because you won’t feel embarrassed if you mess up. That’s the best kind of sex.
From the September 2015 issue of FHM India.
Spotted a mistake, or your photo used without permission? Report a correction
in your inbox