Hot Booze: Mulled Grog Recipes To Fight Off Jack Frost

FHM’s in-house alcohol pro Ewan Lacey has created some mulled grog recipes to help fight off Jack Frost’s icy fingers.

The Hot Buttered Rum Diary

Ingredients: 150ml boiling water, 25ml Havana Club rum, 2tsp brown sugar, 15g butter, cloves, nutmeg, cinnamon

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Method: Make it in the glass, unless you’re making more than two. Dissolve the sugar with hot water, add the butter, spices and rum. Stir, drink, burn your cake hole. Drink more, get a blister on the roof of your mouth. Finish, suck ice.

Enjoy: Before arm-wrestling a fruity pirate.

The Hot Brandy Snap

Ingredients: 150ml Courvoisier, 150ml water, 50g honey, 750ml apple juice, 250ml ginger beer, cinnamon, nutmeg

Method: Heat the water with cinnamon, nutmeg and honey. When hot, add ginger beer and apple juice. When steaming, add brandy. Suddenly it’s no longer just for nans. But the best thing about brandy? It’s a great name for American girls.

Enjoy: With breakfast. Or instead of breakfast.

The Porterhouse

Ingredients: One bottle Taylor’s port, 250ml water, 100g demerara sugar, juice and zest of one orange, three cloves nutmeg, half a cinnamon stick

Method: This jug o’ juice was big in the 19th century for being more alcoholic and therefore better than mulled wine. Heat the water and sugar until the sugar dissolves, add spices. Pour in port, orange zest, orange juice. Guzzle it down and feel your innards glow.

Enjoy: Being applauded for being the drunkest man in the world.

The Jam Jar

Ingredients: 25ml Jameson whiskey, 150ml boiling water, two lemon slices, spoonful of apricot jam, honey

Method: Whiskey toddies are hot, and shit-hotter with apricot jam. Mix the jam with hot water, add lemon slices and whisky, sweeten with honey. Add whiskey. Add more whiskey.

Enjoy: Whilst in bed suffering from lurgi-related AIDS.

The Tipsy Ninja

Ingredients: 100ml Calpico, 50ml Gekkeikan Umeshu sake, water

Method: Get your scary ingredients from japancentre.com and prepare for a tastebud adventure. Fill a quarter of your glass with milky non-alcoholic Calpico and splosh in some collagen-infused sake (Gekkeikan). Top it up with hot water, enter a brave new world.

Enjoy: When prowling around dressed all in black

The Vodka Cup

Ingredients: 150ml Smirnoff vodka, 100ml water, 75ml triple sec, 100g honey, 750ml orange juice and zest, lemon zest, 6 cloves

Method: Transform your late-night nemesis into a delicacy with fire and spices. Add cloves and honey to boiling water until the honey dissolves, pour in orange juice and zest. When bubbling, add the vodka and orange liqueur. Take to natural conclusion.

Enjoy: After schmoozing an exotic cabaret dancer.

FYI

• You’ll notice water in most of these recipes, which helps stop the alcohol evaporating as you warm your booze
• The collagen in the Gekkeikan in The Tipsy Ninja is the good kind that makes you strong, not the bad kind that makes you look like Lil’ Kim.

From the January 2012 issue of FHM India.