Pop Goes The Myth Bubble

There are stereotypes that we weave around the fairer sex. FHM lists the Top 5 prejudices that we’ve grown up listening to, and shows you how you may have been mistaken.

We love them, we chase them and we make a fool of ourselves in wooing them, but once the persuasion is complete we complain about them for being, well, them. There’s a lot that comprises the iceberg of a woman’s personality that remains submerged under that nagging, choking and often claustrophobic exterior. Before you slide off your trolley and make plans to strangle her and repeat the whole love-chase-hate bit for the 37th time, gawk at their real self with our list of myth-breakers about women.
Caution: your girlfriend may be spooked with a sudden change in your attitude towards her.

1. SHE’S KILLED MY SPACE

You’re in your office working like a dog on a leash, and every 15 minutes your phone does a subdued vibrating stunt on your desk. You finally get the time to check and there are 15 messages from your lady, starting with a general forward and finally graduating to a police-custody-like reprimand to call back as soon as you see them. This may sound like an attempt to kill your space, but matters usually reach such extremes due to our own ill-fated contribution. We are so used to making stories up before them that after a while even women know they’re made up, thus earning the right to be nosy on our whereabouts. Don’t forget, it’s not just women who are suckers for attention, and deep down we know it. We equally enjoy the attention we get, and it’s good for a healthy ego. So, don’t push things too hard. Who knows, she might just be checking on you while doing something of her own on the sly!

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We equally enjoy the attention we get, and it’s good for a healthy ego.

2. SHE’S A TOTAL CLEANLINESS FREAK

Remember the good ol’ bachelor pad days? Bed sheets played more roles than what you paid for- a blanket, a hand-towel, or even a curtain. So did so many other things. But ever since she started visiting you, or you moved in with her, all those multi-tasking products lost their gleam of versatility. She tells you what shades match your walls (what? right!), she even asks you to tuck your shirt in and brush your teeth at night. A total controlling b****! But you’ve got to cut her some slack here. Mum did exactly these things to make sure we learnt them by the time we were on our own. Too bad we didn’t and the universe sent us a lover who tele-inherited mum’s good sense in aesthetics. We could give this a shot, though. Making out in a clean apartment sounds more attractive than spilling last night’s coffee in her hair during the foreplay. It’s not freaky, it’s just good sense.

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Bed sheets played more roles than what you paid for- a blanket, a hand-towel, or even a curtain. So did so many other things.

3. ALL SHE LOVES IS PINK

It’s her birthday and you’re foraging gift shops only for shades of pink. You finally find something really cute and get it wrapped. When she finally opens it, she gives the default plastic awww-reaction that makes you most content. But is she really psyched? Chances are she’s not. This is the longest standing myth that women prefer pink while men fall for blue, and for women, also the most irritating. On the contrary it’s us who like to see them in such baby shades that make them look cute and vulnerable. Most women, when shopping for themselves, go for more solid colours. Stop gifting her pink and you’ll see her wardrobe look more like yours gradually.

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This is the longest standing myth that women prefer pink while men fall for blue, and for women, also the most irritating.

4. NOT ANOTHER ROM-COM

You caught her shedding tears after every alternate scene of P S I Love You, and her Facebook page says that she likes Love Actually and You’ve Got Mail. Now whenever there’s an Adam Sandler film in theatres you pre-book your tickets and make her watch it almost on the first day. And still whenever you guys have a fight she has the balls (ok, not balls… nerve) to say that you don’t understand her! This time, while stocking her FB page, do check for the supposed ‘guy’ flicks that she’s also liked and watched. Only not to be judged as a sissy yourself, you should stop taking her out only when rom-coms hit the screens. Take her to a sci-fi next and you’ll be surprised with how she reacts.

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You caught her shedding tears after every alternate scene of P S I Love You, and her Facebook page says that she likes Love Actually and You’ve Got Mail. 

5. NOW LET’S GET MARRIED

A lot of geniuses who don’t crack the IAS exam often start teaching in coaching centres where they prepare you for one. But the same thing often fails miserably in the dating scene. It’s very important who you take to be your guru in the matters of relationships. One aspect that smart-asses like to attribute to women is that even on their first date she pictures you in her favourite groom-ready tux that she spotted in a magazine when she was just 12. Times have moved on since Jane Austen and our lady friends think way beyond marriage. So much so that you might just jeorpardise a fun relationship by popping this question, just because you’re under the impression that she’s ready for marriage all the time, like you’re for some action under the sheets.

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