Should You Brozilian? Find Out If You Should Be A Beach Bear Or A Shaven Seal
We spoke to more than 100 girls, then tried five hair-removal options on one (un)lucky FHM reader, so you can make your own mind up on how far is too far.
Find out if you should be a beach bear or a shaven seal this summer.
We, the men of Great India, are confused. On the one hand, we’re told that girls like their guys clean-shaven and neatly groomed from head-to-toe. At the same time, everywhere you look, the streets of the country are teeming with big, bushy beards and scraggy barnets that appear not to have been washed for a couple of weeks. The male grooming industry is cashing in on our collective anxiety, and a bunch of body-sculpting services catering only to men have been launched, offering everything from the ‘Brozilian’ (yes, it is what it sounds like) to a blokey botox. But should you be shaving your nuts, or should you be getting a kick in them just for thinking about it? To find out, we spoke to more than 100 girls from around the country, before trying out five different hair-removal options out on one (un)lucky FHM reader, so you can make your own mind up on how far is too far.
01 Safety cut
The very first step to a cleaner, sharper look is to tackle the messy barnet. The fellow from Hangover might clean up with the ladies, but a hefty 61% of girls who took our survey said they prefer a guy with a Gosling-inspired smart cut.
The verdict: It’s important to keep your hair in check; just make sure you don’t go too far. A man should never spend more time on his hair than women do.
02 TOWIE pluck
The plucked male eyebrow look might have been brought into the mainstream by English television personality Joey Essex and pals, but should you really go there? “There’s definitely a good middle ground for eyebrows,” says 25-year-old Nini. “But don’t go too far by shaping them. Just make sure that you stay on top of the monobrow.”
The verdict: Your brows should be in line with the outside of each nostril. Anything else is way too much.
03 Classic shave
It’s official: despite your girlfriend salivating over Tom Hardy and his face fuzz, the beard trend has died a slow death. Our survey found that only a dismal 15% of girls now prefer them.
The verdict: If you’ve been rocking stubble for the last few years, it’s time for you to neaten up. Opt for a Philips Bodygroom Pro. It has two ends so you can also trim your pubes without getting ball-to-cheek contamination.
04 Rug remover
Girls love a smooth, silky chest, right? Wrong. According to our survey, 80% of girls love some man-fluff up there.
The verdict: Channel your inner Sean Connery and embrace your manly chest hair. Girls really do love it, and it means you don’t have to go through the agony of a wax.
05 All-over wax
You’ve sorted your hairdo and trimmed your beard, but where else should you tackle? A massive 60% of girls agreed that both toe and back hair should be banished. “I’d vomit if I saw back hair trying to escape from the back of a man’s t-shirt,” says Rebecca from Kent.
The verdict: Save money by taking on back-hair at home.
The stats: man mane vs smooth operator
- 60% of girls said let your chest hair grow
- 9 girls thought male fake tan was acceptable
- Evens: girls were split evenly when it came to waxing, trimming or leaving butt hair
- 95% of girls preferred hairy man-legs
- Skinheads were the preferred choice of just 7% of girls
- 7/10 girls preferred trimmed beards and pubes
- 70% of girls liked a covering of stubble on the jaw
Photography: Marco Vittur.
From the July 2014 issue of FHM India.
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